Oh look, shiny!

Fickle. People are fickle the world over. And God bless them. There's nothing more lovable to a marketing department than people who one minute are talking about their friend's shoes and the next minute saying something like, "ooooh, shiny." They are the kind of people that keep a consumer economy from tanking. It's that "Oh, gotta have it" mentality that allows shoddy, second-rate fashion designers to stay in business. It is the gift of the fickle to keep strange organic goat cheeses and hybrid curd bread on the shelves. But, it is a double-edged sword the fickle wield.  

Fickle people at times can make or break a journalist's career. They can cause market instability and all of a sudden everyone and their grandma is selling. And, it's just something we have to deal with. Over the past 50 years (or perhaps more), people have been rapidly losing their minds. I used to think that perhaps they were just adapting to the information age, and their attention spans were just shorter, but it's more than that. 

We live in an age where everyone wants immediate results. Our food must be done in 5 minutes or less, people must text us no less than thirty seconds later, and slow movies are the bane of people's existences. Many have become, for better or worse, adrenaline junkies. But it's not just the time. They want everything to be perfect. If things don't happen like they planned, they go haywire. "What, you put two teaspoons of chocolate fudge on my icecream?! Screw you!" It's whack. People are wound so tight it's easy to see why we are over-prescribing ourselves. We take medicines to sleep, to stay calm, to digest better, etc, etc. People cannot exist without modern conveniences. People cannot live with themselves as just themselves.  

The perfectionist mentality will only grow, as will the pharmacy's stock of legal heroine substitutes. You can't treat life with a white glove people. Sh*t happens. Deal with it. Try to maintain composure even when everything seems to suck. You have it good. Just look around, breathe, and put down the shiny thing.

Spaghetti=Overrated

So spaghetti. I've decided it's overrated. Seriously. Americans need to branch out every once in a while. Like maybe try linguini, fettuccine, pappardelle, tortellini, ravioli, vermicelli, rigatoni, mostaccioli, manicotti, strozzapreti, radiatore, cavatelli or even campanelle.


And no, I didn't just copy those all from a list on wikipedia (ok, I did for some). But the point is, spaghetti is not the best pasta. It is the most consumed, that I will say, but I will never say it is better than half, or even a majority of the other pasta options. And, you don't have to use just RED sauce. There are pestos, and white sauces that are fabulous. And, stop eating sauce out of the bottle or can all the time. It usually tastes like tomato paste with a little oregano and basil. At least add some flavor to it if you have to use the pre-made crap. And, don't be afraid of cooking your noodles with tons of virgin olive oil and a teaspoon or two of sea salt. I promise you won't regret it. And balsamic vinegar isn't bad in there either. So enough with the cooking lesson.



It's true Americans could eat a little less KFC (JLo likes it), Burger King, Arby's, Carl Jr.'s, and frozen dinners. But isn't it fun to be slovenly? It's too much work to microwave a potato, so I think I should go to a place where it's pre-sliced, and deep fried so that it has no residual potato taste left. And corn dogs are better than eating a pot roast; and they're way cheaper. And with corn in the title, it's like I'm getting a two for one deal: a hot dog AND corn. I'm a friggin genius.




But then on the other side, I could sit around and eat just yogurt and lentils. Ah, then I'd be happy. And my farts would smell like gum drops I bet. I could frolic in a meadow with 12 necklaces around my neck and another 45 around my waist and read poetry to the squirrels. They would love me and bring over acorn tea and massage my feet with their bushy tails. Ah yes, and for breakfast we could eat amaranth and buckwheat and take rodent-sized dumps in the woods, or just go number 1 out the side that should be for number 2.

So perhaps the middle...is......No, it's not better. I'm living with the squirrels. And they better like fettuccine better than spaghetti.

The Provo Divide

In the town of Provo there is a great divide.

I have spoken of it on many occasions with many friends. In Provo, and especially around Brigham Young University, there are a lot of young, college-aged types who are looking for a good education, maybe some work, and a good time. Rarely, do they get all three. And if they do, they are the lucky ones.

As a college town, you might expect there to be a lot of students. This is true. But BYU is not the only school here. There is UVSC (Soon to be UVU), along with many beauty schools and other schools I've never heard of. So, the pond is stocked full of tons of fish. You might think, "Well that's good. If you have lots of fish, you have a lot more options." True. But everyone thinks that way and it creates a mindset that is detrimental to anyone ever getting anywhere in life (socially speaking). With so many options girls and guys around here tend to be either extremely non-committal, or way too committal. The first mindset happens because the first group sees so many options, they become fickle, picky, stupid, and like playing games and become worthless flakes, and the second mindset happens because once the other group finds someone, they cling to them for dear life out of insecurity of the system regardless if the person is an absolute monstrosity. So if that's all we've got, it leads me to wonder, what about the middle? Are you telling me (or am I telling myself) that people either play the field or get married after 6 weeks? Yes. The middle is nearly non-existent.

And, that middle has the only people with any common sense. This middle believes that you can date someone to get to know them and see if something more is there without thinking of long-term all the time. The middle believes that you should date whoever you want, but that being on two dates together does not make you a couple. The middle dates for the sake of dating. And, learns about people, relationships, and what they want out of life in a normal way. They are the balance. But, where are they? Well they have fallen into the Provo divide. Into the deep chasm that is or was the normal way to interact. I am one of them. I am not super-committal (I'm not looking to get married after a couple days or weeks of knowing someone), and I'm not a flake (I don't get interested in one girl on one day and then totally psych myself out, convince myself she's ugly, stupid or uninterested and move on to my back log of other potentials). So where do I fit here? That's a good question. Perhaps I just need to go back to the real world (like any place outside of Utah).

The FFF

Now, from what I gather the whole internet social networking thing, is sort of "a big deal, " which brings with it a whole new world of relations and terminology. One such fun new acronym is best described as someone who adds you as a facebook friend, only to dump you and then re-add you just to keep tabs. These are the Fickle Facebook Friends, or, 'FFF' if you like. I know you all have at one point or another had something like that happen to you, be it on myspace, facebook, orkut or whatever. However, given that facebook is the most legimate of the network sites, being safest, and least whore-like when it comes to advertising and ownership, the new terminology comes from it. Don't bother remembering FFF's birthdays...they're just using you.