Indulge in Good Food

I'm a curious person. I always have been. And, my curiosity has led me to believe that certain things are just not fair, right, or sensical. A prime example is good tasting food. Generally speaking (and health nuts will dispute this), good tasting food is often very bad for you. Why is that? It's because it usually is loaded with fats, sugar, and tastiness. 

But why is tastiness a bad thing? Why not have a little fat and sugar? I mean, I'm not going to gorge myself in danishes and pudding all day and then top it off with 8 buckets of Kentucky Fried Chicken, but I can have some good tasting food every now and then right? I mean, sure celery and carrots can keep your mouth occupied, but it's like waiting for a bus. You feel like you're wasting your time. There is no satisfaction. And, even when the bus comes, it takes forever to get home. Good food, on the other hand, is like teleportation. Instant satisfaction. Bada Bing. Bada Boom (Trekies are loving this post, and are now thinking of teleporting food directly into their stomachs).

Think of your favorite food. Stop thinking about the calories. Stop thinking about fitting into some ridiculous pair of pants. Just think of that savory goodness on your plate. Mmmmm. It's good. Give in. Give in!*

*I'm sorry if I ruined your New Year's resolution. Most Americans give up after 10 days anyway. Get a new resolution to stop making resolutions and eat good food from now on.

New Wearable Feedbags Let Americans Eat More, Move Less

Listening to the beautiful Muzak....

I know you all love waiting for customer service people on the phone. That lovely classical music or smooth jazz just makes you giddy. Well I am going to release the names of certain companies that have longer than usual wait times, so you get your fill of muzak.

One company that lets me wait for as long as I want, and then some, is MLB.com.  Those blessed souls on average let me listen to anywhere from 7-10 tracks of beautiful muzak.

Another very considerate service that lets me listen to classical music is Brigham Young University's Financial Office.  They tell you an approximate wait time, and then (bless them) they extend it by two or three times the approximation.

Now one company that has a very short wait time, hardly ever letting me hear the first track all the way through, is my bank.  Chevy Chase is quick, and the lip service and real people on the other end are disconcertingly non-muzak-like.  

So, that is my observation today.  Feel free to add to the list.

I killed a baby giraffe.

So of course I hunted and killed many exotic animals at the wild animal park. And my favorite one to kill was a baby giraffe. It's mom kept making hawing noises and hitting me with her hooves, but I got the shot off. I'm mounting it on my wall.

In other news I went surfing this morning. I went to Huntington Beach. It was overcast and sprinkling from time to time. The surf was horrible. There were no consistent sets; it was very choppy and two "do-gooders" almost ran off with my surfboard and bag while I was out carving what pipe I could find. However, the water temperature was good. 61 degrees. I loved it. The temperature that is. I'm betting tomorrow will be better as we head towards Big Sur and ride some stuff on the central California coast. We'll stop by Morro Bay, Cayucos, and maybe San Simeon.



A little word to the wise for romantics: Don't wait for people. If your boyfriend says he's going away for two years, kiss him goodbye and look elsewhere. There are too many good eggs in this basket we call earth to waste your life away waiting for a nice speckled brown egg to come back to hatch and roost with you. It's stupid. Even if you do "wait for him, " which to me is absolute BS, you will probably go out with other guys, have other relationships and live your life. So, don't look at me funny when I think you're a complete moron for dumping your boyfriend, saying no to James Bond and trying to get back together with this guy who's been away for two years. First, it's stupid. Second, you broke up for no good reason. Second again, you broke two hearts at least. Third, you don't even know if the guy you waited for is the same one you are trying to get back with. And fourth, you are a different person too. Don't cut yourself short. There are always more fish in the sea and life is worth living. Don't wait. Carpe Diem! But at the same time, if you do wait and it doesn't work out...c'est la vie. You can't always get what you want, but if you try some time, you get what you need. I heard that somewhere before....