Random Stories of Non-Laziness

Some of you might think to yourselves, "Man is that guy who writes the Satire Report lazy. He always wants his co-writers to fill in for him, and then decides to take an extended hiatus when Michael Jackson dies." Okay, maybe none of you were thinking that. Maybe you think it a lot (I mean, like every time MJ dies). Wait a second. I'm definitely not lazy. Some people only update their blogs once a month, or once a week. I do it almost daily. Emphasis on ALMOST. Ok. Random story time.

So I spent most of today making a little extra cash moving furniture, boxes, and pianos. Those of you who follow me on twitter know that. I'm sorry I'm repeating myself. I have also decided I will never become a professional mover. That piano was only a small one, but I could have easily been crushed or paralyzed. Fortunately I did not have to take it upstairs (only up and down from the truck and up and down a few front steps). But, maybe if I had professional mover gear I would've been able to save some of my strength (or back/shoulders/legs). Who knows? Movers probably. Oh, and I have now become more familiar with my friend Benjamin, so that's a plus.

But moving stuff wasn't enough. No. I decided to drive along the proposed bike route my Dad was plotting for some Boy Scouts. He printed out some directions from google maps, except they were only maps with a highlighted route, and as it turns out, did not show enough detail. Unfortunately I was the co-pilot, and so we took quite a few detours. Fortunately, one such detour took us by some pygmy horses (not ponies, my mother corrected me), and another detour got us all some slim jims and an odd assortment of nuts. My favorite detour, however, involved McDonald's. They have angus burgers now. And, I've found that other than being larger, they taste the same. McDonald's fail. But, it's McDonald's, so I guess I shouldn't have expected Ruth's Chris Steakhouse.

Ok, random stories over. Random pictures begin:

Well, you have to weigh them sometime.

Merman! Merman!

Every day man. Every day.

Without me it's only 'aweso'.

You can hear it just by looking at the picture.

Move over Dwight Howard (in some places this might be considered abuse - just like Obama swatting that fly).

Humor My Rant

I am really angry. I don't know who to be angry with. I guess I am just mad and all general directions. If you are still reading, here is the story. . . .

The day that Jeff lost his job, we got a letter from the high school band letting us know about the spring trip. The temporary itinerary included things like Disney World, Wet and Wild theme park and The Blue Man Group. Four fun filled days in the sun of Florida for my 16 year old and his band geek friends. Jeff and I were both in the band and we know how awesome the spring trips can be. I went to Florida, Myrtle Beach, Montreal, and Atlanta each year of my high school experience. I LOVED the spring trips. So of course I wanted my son to have the same rights of passage that I enjoyed in my youth. However, the cost of the trip was about $500 for the parents to pony up. I told Sam that we would commit to the trip but that he would have to work to defray some of the cost. The boy has done NOTHING. AND I found out this week that because he didn't participate in the citrus fundraiser, there was a buy out cost of an additional $160.00. So on top of the $400 that I have already paid, I got a notice that the trip has increased in cost and I owe an additional $465 by the beginning of next month.

Who should I be mad at? Well, I am mad at myself for not putting the screws to my son. I did make him apply for 2 jobs which he never followed up on. I am mad at my son for having seemingly no ambition. I am mad at the band for making such an expensive band trip and then forcing families to participate in the fundraisers or have a $160 buy out fee. Now, I don't know what to do. I guess I'll be mad for a bit. If you have any suggestions on how best to use this opportunity to teach my son a lesson about responsibility, let me know.