Monday, June 1, 2009

Now Hiring!

Advertisement consultant

-No previous market experience necessary

-Must be able to find creative ways to misspell a generic product name for trendiness/trademark purposes, such as replacing "c" with "k," "s" with "z," and "ph" with "f."

-Must look for opportunities to rhyme, use alliteration, create sappy puns (is there another kind?), and be competent in the reworking of clich├ęs to include product promotion.

-Must be able to figure out a clever, memorable 6-10 letter word or phrase for an 800 number.

-Must be able to translate... or know someone who can... yeah.

-And above all, must be honest.